Personal

While at lunch with a coworker I was once told that she had never knew anyone who had such an interesting background. Thinking that she must of lives a very sheltered life I didn't think much of it.

After I became disabled I started looking back and some of the projects I have been involved with. And after giving it some though decided that for someone with GED and only a few years of Bible College, I have indeed done a few things a lot of people never have the chance to.

From putting strips on candy canes to providing telemetry support for manned spacecraft with NASA, from photographing Congressmen and Senators and helping missionaries all over the world with images to working on brochures for Holiday Inn and the Texas Rangers, from working on a project designing a database driven multimedia delivery system that is used in High Schools throughout the U.S. to working as house parents for teenage girls coming from troubled homes, yes if you look at it like that, then I can say I have had a very sorted background.

In an effort to try an reestablish some self worth, become disabled often leads to depression, I have collect a number of career goals and highlights.

I am including it for two reasons. One to help myself in realizing I have had the privilege to be part of something and consider myself fortunate to be part of, and two, to share with my family and friends some of the things I have done. I know for myself, I would like to have more information about my father. Maybe my children or grand children will like to know a little more about their father or grandfather.

Anyway, here is a collection of personal goals. I do not do this boastfully but rather with humility and thanking the so many people who have given me opportunities along the way. Some times it's after you are no longer part of something that you realize just how important the something was, and how much of a privilege it was to be part of it.

Two Years Ago!

At time when you read my posting they may seem to conflict with other ramblings I have made. The truth is they may because I am going through changes. In fact they are sometime happening so quickly that I have not come to terms with many of them.

My physical and mental health has taken so much from me that I sometimes find it hard to enjoy life. While I know that there are others far worse off them me and I should be thankful for what I have, then depressed for what I have lost. It is hard.

As a person we constantly look at things from our own perspective. Our gateway to the world is through our eyes and our perception of it is through our mind. So just the fact I am human makes me somewhat self centered. I can not feel your pain or your hurt, just as you can not feel mine. We can care for one another and hurt to a degree when someone we care about hurts. But to say I feel your pain just doesn't cut it.

I remember telling my doctor about my depression and being told, well you just lost your home, your van, your job, you are no longer in control of your income, and you say you feel depressed. Of course you are, that is normal. Anyone would feel depressed after going through that.

Tomorrow it will be two years since I lost my job and within 3 days of two years that I was found to be disabled by Social Security.

Does time go by when you are depressed or what? In some ways it seams like just yesterday in others it has been a lifetime ago.

Now to see what the next two years bring.